[x]

RelapseIt’s like counting
Saturn’s rings,
hash marks
along your limbs -
remembering a time
when

‘just one more’

made you feel better.

- & you’re sitting there
wondering why
Draco, stuck in limbo
always looks like he’s

falling.

Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
Maybe.
But at least it makes me
Me.

UneditedWe cry.
We scream.
We fight for our dream.

We scream.
We cry.
We're just waiting to die.

The same emotions
with a different drive.
Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.

The same in one way,
different in another
brother and sister, sister and brother.

So close in feeling,
so different in the end.
Falling apart, or finally on the mend?

Which am I?
Will I ever know?
Fighting to stay or ready to go?

Maybe I'm both,
in some impossible way.
Emotions oddly mixed everyday.

Wouldn't surprise.
I'm such a freak.
Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"

Battle in my MindEat.
Don't eat.
Take it easy.
Work out until you pass out.
Get help.Tell someone.
Keep it a secret. It's only for you and me.
You're perfect.
You're worthless.
You're beautiful.
You're disgusting.
Why won't you listen?
They don't understand.
Let me help you.
You don't understand.
Show me.
No!
I love you..

WorthlessWorthless,
the name that cuts like a knife,
Me,
it's all that you see inside,
My heart,
is breaking with every breath I take
The lies,
the only thing I can't seem to face.

In The Daylight

In The Daylight

A false downfall
An unexpected revival

Sunset to moonset
Shining through darkness

Life...redefined
Death...redesigned

In the valley of promises- I will fear no end
On the brink of weakness- I will ascend
-
Roads of the toughest
Paths of the darkest

I conditioned my flawed limits
So fearful memories won't be paralytic

I had to raise my own spirit
Strength and endurance become so vivid

A chance for change / A moment of fate
A time to make peace / A brief feeling of creed
A sealing of my slate / A silencing of my mistakes
A secret ready to be freed / A chain soon-to-be incomplete

Pain and peace are infinite
Judge the wrat

wallflower clippingsthere's scar tissue in her throat,
swollen around the words she never said;
dark rings around her eyes
like planets unremembered, and
a staleness to her touch,
the crystalline Dead Sea.

she's living like a story
that's already been told
"if no one loved you
would you mean anything at all?"

in that moment,
we forget to exist.

Ode to the boy with diamonds for eyesI think we were a collision course waiting to happen
And when I think back to the day when we first
Stumbled across one another, red sneakers hanging off gutters
Cherry cola voice overs and dilated pupils
We led one another on to believe in the night sky of connect the dot constellations

You wanted to dissect me and peer into the insides of my lungs
Only to find witches breath and dandelions
Slicing iron vowels you locked your hands in mine
And we fell into the static of dreaming disease
The operating table broke away to reveal a sky that never existed
And we couldn't help but laugh at the irony
Because wishing was never an option
The ane

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

Our MasksThe masks we wear are perfect
Never loose and rarely tight
They keep us safe from others
And keep our demons out of sight

They smile when we are broken
And laugh when we simply must
No blemish or imperfection
A creation that will never rust.

I seldom ever remember
Who I am without my mask
That to peel off that layer
Is such a daunting task

All others carry one as well
Wherever they may go
And no matter what is on their minds
Only the molded mask will show.

The lies they preach in public
Or the scars along their wrists
Are left mute to others knowledge
Ignorance is such a splendid gift

My mask is oh so perfect
Not a crack will show
Alway

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

LonelyLonely.
Unnoticed.
People don't even look
when they walk by.
Always ignored...
Nobody even asks my ideas,
my opinion.
Nobody even knows
who I am.
When people see me,
they either ignore me,
or ask a question:
"Who are you?"
But they don't even bother
to listen to my response:
"I'm Canada."
Forgotton.
Forgotton by everyone.
Forgotton by my friends, my allies.
Maybe one day
Someone will remember my name.
Canada.

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

Honesty Written

from the

heart.

No eraser.

Lost In ConfusionLost In Confusion

My mind is spinning without a rest
Emotions whirl and twirl around
A merry-go-round gaining speed
Until the world blurrs before my eyes
What's happening? What's going on?

The simplest thought slips away
Right from my mind, fading so fast
Trying to focus, I stare and stare
Until my eyes are heavy and unclear.
I don't understand, what is going on..

Emotions rise and fall again
Within the blink of an eye
I'm crying, laughing, and depressed
A roller-coaster ride that never ends
Am I losing my mind in this?

I try to close my eyes and rest
But the world spins me around
I feel like I am failing this test
Voices and noises echo

Browse More Like This

Download File
HTML, 4.2 KB more ▶

More from ~PenlessAuthor

Butterfly KissesI can't sleep because thoughts of you
               Are raceraceracing through my mind
Like the sound of the rain,
               Patpatpattering on my roof,
Like the sound of lightning and thunder,
Boomboombooming outside,
And like the feel of your lips,
              Kisskisskissing me on my own.
[small and rapid, you said,
"they're like butterflies.
Butterfly
      &#

Maybe...Maybe you're too much for me to handle,
But maybe I'll find a way.

Maybe we weren't meant to be,
But maybe I can make us happen.

Maybe we can't ever make it,
But maybe we can.

And maybe we're just going to get hurt,
But maybe I just don't care.

Still Painting FlowersI still remember every second I spent with you. There are no gaps, no holes in my memory, no forgetting. Your eyes were the perfect hue of forget-me-not blues, and your lips were like roses, the deepest shade of red I've ever seen.

Do you remember me the way I remember you? Do you remember how my hair was the most imperfect color of brown, and how the highlights shone in the sun, but no other time? Do you remember how my eyes changed colors depending on the weather and my mood? Do you remember how my mood changed depending on the weather? Maybe that's why my eyes changed for the weather, too. I don't know.

Your nose was always as sharp as a

I Could Promise YouI could promise you,
Rainbows and butterflies,
And dragons and ruby glass slippers,
And all the impossible things,
If it would make you love me.

I could promise you,
Leprechauns and faeries,
And dogs and cats,
And everything in between,
If it would make you love me.

I could promise you,
Love and life,
And laughter and smiles,
And all the good things in life,
If it would make you love me.

I could promise you,
Money and power,
And rings and necklaces,
And anything of the sort,
If it would make you love me.

But in all honesty, it won't,
You won't,
So I won't.

View Gallery

Featured in Groups:

Not currently featured in any groups.

Details

Submitted: December 4, 2010
File Size: 4.2 KB

Link

Thumb

Statistics

Comments: 5
Favourites: 5 [who?]
Views: 66 (0 today)
Downloads: 1 (0 today)

[x]

Ten Days - Day One

by ~PenlessAuthor, Dec 4, 2010, 11:28:08 AM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

_{i.
       Your breath stole mine,
       And just FYI,
       I need that back.
       [I'll trade you my bleeding heart
       For my whispered oxygen]

ii.
        My greatest fear is that one day
        I'll wake up and you'll be long,
        Long gone, [because despite
        Being through hell and back with me,
        You always chose him.]

iii.
         I know nothing about you, but I think
         I love you. And not in the
         [I'm a stupid teenager who's completely
         Ruled by hormones" way,
         Either.]

iv.
          I'm afraid we're just too different.
          They always said we were
          Opposites.
          [Well, I'm sick of your blinding light
          Swallowing up my dark.]

v.
           I just want to thank you
           For showing me just how it feels
           To know hate like a sister.

vi.
            Your lips enchant me and I wonder
            When I started caring
            About what peoples' lips are like.

vii.
             You
             Haunt
             My
             Living
             Nightmares.

viii.
              You filled me with hope of a
              Nonexistent deity and
              Watched as I burnt down my life
              In his name.
              [Why didn't you stop me?]

ix.
               Why didn't you protect me,
               Like you promised to?

x.
                I don't need your protection.
                I'm just fine on my own.
                [I've become a fantastic liar.]}

Ten Days - Day Oneby ~PenlessAuthor

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

_{Day one, of the Ten Days Of Honesty.
[link]

I have to catch up, so I'll be writing one more to catch up. I may not be able to post one every day, but I'll write them in my notebook and post them here when I can.

Oh yeah, and I'm going to be doing this, too: [link]

Lord only knows when I'll get this done and have time to post it.

I miss you all.}

!tamikagrace Dec 4, 2010

_{hey, you're doing this to ^___^ yay.

& this is wonderful. you're a fantastic writer. (:}

~PenlessAuthor Dec 5, 2010

_{Yeah ^__^

Thankyou.}

~sarhar101 Dec 4, 2010 Student Traditional Artist

This is lovely.

~PenlessAuthor Dec 5, 2010

~sarhar101 Dec 5, 2010 Student Traditional Artist

<3 ^_^

More from ~PenlessAuthor

Featured in Groups:

Details

Statistics

Ten Days - Day One

Ten Days - Day Oneby ~PenlessAuthor

The Journal Portal

Polls

What is your preferred drawing software?

deviantART [dee·vee·un'nt·ART]

Keep in Touch!

Deviousness

Add Media

Style